It never ceases to frustrate me how many people in “leadership” positions penalize the people who work hardest for them. Why disparage those who work for you? Does that ever work? What could you possibly be thinking when you so diligently set out to destroy morale of everyone around you?
But the question that I most want to ask bad bosses and leaders is: Have you never seen a movie?
Or read a story? Tv even? Seriously. It’s really irritating to see such blatant ignorance. The tyrant always loses.
Does anyone ever root for the heartless tyrant?
Lets look at the well known story Robin Hood.
The sheriff of Nottingham is evil, mean, pretty much without redeemable qualities whatsoever. His greed and selfishness are undeniable. But above all, he treats everyone around him like dirt. He yells, he screams, he blames others for his mistakes. Nothing is ever good enough, all he sees is failure in his people. As a result, he fails. His soldiers and men fear him, but they don’t respect him. They work for money, or for lack of options, but they are anything but loyal. Belittled, broken people will do just enough to stay off the radar. When no one is looking, productivity ceases. The sheriff stands around ordering people to do his dirty work and, at the end of the day, you can’t expect people to do things for you, that you wouldn’t do yourself.
Whereas Robin’s men are loyal to the death. He treats his people as equals, he is kind and obviously a generous person. People are inspired by his leadership to the point that the very idea of Robin Hood is what has power, the man is no longer necessary. Robin Hood stands side by side with those who follow him, fighting and bleeding and sacrificing as much if not more of himself… and that is why he always wins.
Inspiration is a far stronger motivator than fear. Fear is temporary. Inspiration has a life of its own.
So again, why do “leaders”, “managers”, people in charge resort to acting like tyrants?
More importantly…..how do these people get promoted in the first place?
Yesterday I free form ranted about the lameness of the ever controlling, ever psychotic Edward Cullen. At the end I left you with this little gem:
Edward Cullen is an allegory for Heroin.
Bella is a tragic drug addict who eventually overdoses. Lets look at some of the classic signs of drug addiction.
Feeling that you have to use the drug regularly: This sums up Bella’s feeling towards Edward pretty accurately. She gets nervous when he’s out of sight. Anytime he disappears for an afternoon she spends the time wallowing in whiny self pity.
Feeling that you need the drug to deal with your problems: She pretty much abandons all idea of a future without him. She is unable to make any choices without Edward’s approval. Anytime anything happens she has to consult her drug for answers.
Focusing more and more time and energy on getting and using the drug: Face it. All of Bella’s time and energy revolve around finding ways to spend more time with her drug.
Other symptoms include, isolation, impaired judgment, panic, depression ect.
So, basically if you wanted to describe someone with a drug problem, just describe Bella Swan. She constantly lies to her father and to a lessor extent her mother. She has no friends outside of Edward’s family. This isn’t romance, its addiction.
The entirety of New Moon is Bella going through a LONG drawn out detox. When the movie shows Bella sitting in that chair while the months pass, I see that creepy detox scene from Trainspotting with the baby on the ceiling. I’m serious. Its the same thing, pathetic screams and all.
compare to…
After Edward leaves and Bella goes through detox, she starts to get her shit together again. She still harbors some suicidal tendencies, but she is forming a semi- normal bond with a long time friend. Until she goes back in for another hit. She becomes a desperate addict again and it kills her. Yes Bella is eventually overcome with so much stupidity that she overdoses on Edward.
This is a story that only holds a shred of romanticism because it is told from the perspective of the junkie. Of course a junkie will tell you heroin is awesome, they’re a friggin junkie! Told from, perhaps, her father’s perspective this entire saga becomes a very sad tale of a girl who couldn’t just say no to drugs. So if you drop away the angst and the prepubescent glamorization, we have a bland, lifeless, boring girl who gets tangled up in drugs and dies as a result. Yes. Yes I see why everyone is obsessed with this. makes perfect sense to me now….ugh.
Can we collectively stop making this “character” a role model? She has no redeemable qualities. Twilight is a terrible example of everything. Relationships, growing up, decision making…. even the writing….everything is just awful.
Please J.K. Rowling, write some more books now so we can leave Stephanie Meyer far far behind us.
For an awesome f-bomb filled synopsis of the last book proceed to this link.
Ok, I’ll admit that title might be a bit extreme, but Twilight is seriously misleading and damaging to a person’s perspective on relationships.
I wrote a little about my dislike for the scourge of literature that is the Twilight Saga when the teaser trailer for Eclipse first hit the internet, but now that every other Tweet or Facebook status update I read is about this stupid movie, I feel I can stay silent no longer!
They are awful books and its horrifying that little girls are idolizing them. Though I really wish it weren’t the case, I have read all 4 books, each a bigger train wreck than the one before. I kept hoping that the worst was behind me. Maybe the end was worth all this ridiculous melodrama, but no. Nothing of value ever popped up, it just kept getting worse.
Bella and Edward have, maybe, the most unhealthy relationship ever. The relationship is a classic example of abuse. One could argue that his controlling behavior is all in Bella’s best interest and within the confines of the story they’d have a case. A weak case, but there is some evidence to support such a thing.
When listening to someone insist that Edward’s controlling (psychotic) nature is only for clumsy Bella’s benefit I can’t help but think she’s trading her practically absent biological father for a over-protective supernatural one.
It is outside the confines of the story that Twilight has danger. This poorly written series has become a cultural phenomenon. Little girls, teens, grown ass women are idolizing Edward and Bella as if this is the perfect example of what relationships should be. If this is what a relationship should be like, then I guess sign me up for an Ice pick lobotomy RIGHT NOW.
He constantly keeps her from seeing a childhood friend to the point where he disables her car. He encourages her to lie to her father, repeatedly. He “nonchalantly” mentions that if she leaves him that he will kill himself. It goes on and on. If you want a good list of the examples of controlling behavior I09 had a nice article about it
But no, I get off topic….control is not the real issue at hand. My point is that…..
Edward Cullen is an allegory for Heroin.
This got a lot longer than I’d planned so more on that tomorrow….
“Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. ~Lily Tomlin
I would be lying if I said I didn’t complain. I do. Frequently. In fact if my mouth is moving there is at least a 40% chance the words falling out are some kind of “complaint”. I tend to rant about lousy things that happen throughout my day, but I try not to dwell, and I’m trying to cut back. I like to think of it as venting. Like a release valve, I get it all out and feel much better afterward.
Apparently, complaining is habit forming, and generally spreads bitterness and negativity. But its so fun. Like vodka. Fun in moderation, but keep at it and you’ll be miserable in the morning.
However, there is a difference in complaining about something legitimately, and complaining just to complain. Chronic complainers are annoying. These people try to martyr themselves at any opportunity. They tend to be self absorbed and talk continually about how they’ve been singled out, and picked on unfairly.
Ugh.
Let me complain about the complainers. It’s hard to be around these people, everything is wrong and bad and somehow mistreating them. It’s exhausting! If all you see in life are the bad things, then all you’ll have are bad things! Try changing your perspective. Be grateful for something instead of wallowing in your negativity.
There ARE times to complain. Sometimes you might need advice, or need to bring events to someone’s attention. After all, the squeaky wheel gets greased and all that noise. However, if the only reason you complain is to get pity from those around you…. well maybe you should knock it off.
Weekends are a bit like rainbows; they look good from a distance but disappear when you get up close to them. ~John Shirley
My weekend has been a whirlwind of insanity. It is for this reason that I regret to inform you that this is not a usual Monday morning update.
This is a cop out.
This is me, phoning in a Monday article.
The more I think about it, the more I start to realize that maybe having Monday be the first post of the week was a flawed plan. Monday are terrible. Does anyone really give 100% on Monday morning?
I have other excuses for my laze. For example my schizoid boss is “re-configuring” everyone’s schedule. I have no idea how I got Monday off this week, but I’m going to run with it.
Or I could blame Netflix for their outstanding instant streaming service that brings me constant, mindless entertainment.
But really, the fault is mine. I shouldn’t try to pass the blame on this one. I don’t have to work today, and therefore my eyes demand more closed time. I see the picture up there of that awesome napping cat and I can’t help but want to go back to sleep. A mid-morning nap, if you will. Even the promise of coffee is not enough to keep my eyes open.
…and so I will return to slumber and hope that those of you who are back to the grind this morning have as pleasant a Monday as your circumstances and outlook allow.
Most of us have had big family holidays with aunts, uncles, cousins, and relatives of all varieties. Usually at large gatherings like this the children get their own table. The kids usually love this since it means they don’t have to listen to boring grown up talk and they get to use less than polite table manners.
At the kid’s table all the utensils are dull, sometimes the cups have lids and are almost always made of plastic, and an adult cuts up any meat since the children aren’t allowed to have knives. The kid’s table is protected from things that those seated around it, aren’t ready to handle.
Occasionally, you might need to send an adult back to the metaphorical “kid’s table.”
There are people that will be in your life because of circumstance. In-Laws, Co-workers, roommates and family are ingrained in your life. These are usually not people you can simply ignore, but occasionally some of them need to be isolated from certain things. Things, they might not be able to handle for various reasons. Without sounding like I’ve watched too many crime shows, maybe they can’t be trusted with certain information. Information that can be passed around as hurtful gossip, or used as emotional blackmail. They are no longer mature enough to have your total trust. Maybe they never were.
It’s hard to cut them out of your life, so try to filter them instead. Minimize the damage by limiting the things you share with them. Trust has to be earned, but also maintained. It’s a difficult road to re-gain trust after it has been lost. If, once kid’s tabled, they can mature and act like a trustworthy grown up again, then you can decide to let them come back to the big table.
For now, hand them a spork and a sippy cup and direct them to their new seat. Sometimes its easier to filter the knowledge they have than to confront them.
South by Southwest is, if you are lucky enough to have avoided knowledge so far, an epic week long festival of music and movies and such that happens in Austin, TX every year. It pretty much takes over the entire city with its shenanigans.
SXSW for the cool kids I guess. And by cool kids I mean Hipsters. Trend junkie Hipsters,who pride themselves in being smug bastard know-it-all’s. You know that guy who always talks about some obscure band that doesn’t even have a wiki and acts like you’re some sort of social pariah for being ignorant of Band X’s greatness? He’s a hipster. If more than 5 people like Band X, then he will have to hate them. Its the hipster code.
Anyway, SXSW. I hear about this thing every fucking year, and I manage not to care. SXSW news has infected seemingly ALL of my RSS feeds and it pisses me off. What the hell is so awesome about this thing? Everywhere I look, everything I read is tagged with SXSW. (more…)
We are all used to the fairy tale wrap up at the end of Disney animated features. Prince and princess kiss, and live happily ever after.
Do they really though? How can this fairy tale magic work if the princess has only just met her liberator?
Disney has made a lot of money marketing their princesses, but their princes are boring, dull, and lifeless. The prince characters exist only to rescue the princess and become a last minute solution to poverty, abandonment, and loneliness.
The princess hardly knows a prince before she is carried away to his castle to spend the rest of her life with him. What has she got herself into? Some of the Disney princes don’t even have proper names and are only an archetype of a strong male savior, swooping in to save the day and validate the princess’s struggle. Let’s look at the worst offenders: (more…)
When we first met, I knew it was love. We spent hours together discovering hilarious movie quotes and remembering long-forgotten TV shows I once loved. Your wealth of trivia was unmatched by any I had ever met! You had all the answers for me. You knew everything I asked you. You were magnificent! You helped me grow and strive for more knowledge and connect with others who shared my interests. Even after connecting with others, I consulted you on a regular basis! I found, in you, everything I had been looking for in a movie website. But I’m afraid you’ve changed IMDB. And not for the better.
At first you only hinted that I support you. That was fine, because after all, you were giving me so much! We would go on study dates together — looking for inane film trivia — and you would give me that little nudge, suggesting that I’d need to pay to keep this relationship afloat. Against my better judgment I stayed loyal to you, but those days are over IMBD! Your demand for money to gain access has really hurt our relationship. You have locked me out of the intimate details in your world, only willing to submit if I join your “professional” club. (more…)
You must forgive me if I’m crying, but I just found out that Hollywood is working on a NeverEnding Story remake. I’m not going to recap the plot of the original for you, because if you haven’t seen it, I don’t believe you have a pulse. However, for the quick reminder, its the 80’s movie with the flying dog-looking “luck dragon.”
“They” claim that this new interpretation will be more like the book. That the new movie will be a closer adaptation of the source material. It’s not so much that I’m upset they’re remaking THIS movie, (although I clearly AM upset). I am more upset that it seems like every movie that comes out anymore is a remake! Doesnt anyone write anything good anymore? Everything that hits theaters seems to be a rip off of something else.
The 80’s are hot right now, but do we really need to see it all again? Wasn’t once enough? Isn’t it enough to just cherish the great movies and cartoons of childhood? Why must Hollywood remake everything? Do we have no original ideas anymore? Do we really have to squeeze every last penny out of every idea anyone has ever had?
Don’t spur a willing horse.
