“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.” ~Dr. Seuss

I know someone who speaks in a false accent.  At least we’re all pretty sure she’s faking, because every now and then it vanishes entirely and she sounds like a bland mid-western.  No one is sure why she tries to pass herself as a prim Brit.  Maybe she thinks it makes her seem more important, or special, but it manages only to make her look silly.  She’s trying too hard to be someone she isn’t.

While I hope none of you are faking an accent,  we all wear social masks from time to time.  We pretend to be something that isn’t quite true to fit in with others.  We conform to what we think others want us to be, and we hide our true self for fear that we would be rejected.  And lets face it… sharing yourself with others openly, honestly and being rejected…. sucks.

So we project false traits or persona’s to protect ourselves.  Many times we have several different persona’s that we wear in different circumstances.  We repress opinions that might offend others, or smile when we really don’t mean it, and unfortunately in our society, we have to.

It’s unlikely you’d have a successful job interview if you were truly yourself.  Showing up in pajamas without combing your hair isn’t going to impress anyone.  So you dress up, you look nicer than you would for a night of playing Smash Bros with your friends.  When the interviewer asks you what your greatest weakness is you have some cookie cutter response like “I work too hard, I’m a workaholic.” When the truth is “I procrastinate too much and most of the time I’ve finished a project minutes before the deadline.”

Social masks are a necessary evil.  I don’t think you’ll lose your identity  by wearing nice clothes to impress an interviewer, or laughing at a joke you don’t think is funny.  Hopefully you can recognize yourself in your masks.  At the core, your values and personality should still exist.  Hopefully, you haven’t abandoned too much of who you are just to fit in.

Hopefully you aren’t from Iowa pretending to be British.

(Photo by Alaskan Dude)